resigned detachment

Now playing: Big Yellow Taxi, Counting Crows. Heh. Ironic.

I'm struggling with how to interact with the world. I look at the news (yes Justin, at www.foxnews.com) and I have a hard time not going "meh, who cares?" It just seems easier to not be concerned at all about the world around me. Why should I bother? I've got enough to worry about, darn it.

If I was being dishonest, I'd probably blame my eschatology. Afterall, everyone knows that a dispensationalist - even a progressive one - can't have a positive outlook on the direction the world is going. On the one hand, that's kinda true. On the other hand, when you look at the news and the leading story is about two second graders being found stabbed to death, it's hard to understand how anyone could have a positive outlook on the ultimate direction of mankind and history.

I know better. My eschatology does lend itself to caring about the individuals who populate the world. They need Jesus, and how.

So, it ends up being far more basic than that. It ends up being a selfishness thing. Cause ultimately, I sell myself on the fact that I'm better than them, and more deserving of good things; ultimately, I convince myself that loving myself is really the best thing to do.

Why am I telling you this? Cause confession is good for the soul? I'm not sure. What I do know is that my perspective is off. I guess starting from a selfish perspective leaves you with no choice but determining in the end that it's all about numero uno.

Blah blah blah, I'm rambling.

You should read matt cook's blog. It's funny. I'm not only a member, I'm also a client.

Wow. Maybe I'll come back when I can act like maybe the world isn't all about me, and make some logically sound, relevant arguments. G'night!